Social anxiety will tell you many lies, but we’re here to tell you these five important truths.
Do you feel extremely scared of meeting new people or being judged by others?
If you’ve been having this feeling for a period of six months or more, then you might be struggling with something a bit more major than a bout of shyness. You could be experiencing a social anxiety disorder (SAD).
Sometimes referred to as social phobia, SAD is an anxiety disorder that causes extreme fear of social interactions. The idea of attending a party or talking to someone can already trigger symptoms like increased heart rate or sweating. As a result, people with SAD often isolate themselves and avoid social settings altogether.
In the process, they end up blaming themselves for their uncontrolled emotional response to these situations and develop low self-esteem. However, we’re here to tell you the truth: it is not your fault.
Moreover, social anxiety can lead you to believe lies about yourself that couldn’t be farther from the truth. So, if you’re reading this and currently fighting social anxiety, pay close attention because these are five truths that you need to hear:
Having a social anxiety disorder does not make you weak.
Fighting social anxiety disorder is an everyday battle that takes a lot of strength to deal with. The fact that every single day you do your best to actively counter your negative thoughts and think through your emotions is already a testament to how strong you are.
It can be mentally, emotionally, and physically draining having to go to war with your mind daily. It may even lead you to believe that you’re weak because there are days when you give in and don’t succeed. We’re here to tell you right now that you’re strong not because you fail sometimes, but because you never stop fighting and get back up every single time.
The perseverance to keep continuing your treatments, managing your anxiety, and courage to continually try to come out of your shell is what makes you incredibly strong.
There will always be someone who won’t like you and that’s okay.
With social anxiety comes the intense need to please everybody. However, the truth is, there’s always gonna be that one person you won’t have good chemistry with. It’s not your fault nor is it theirs. It’s just how relationships work and it just means that you’re drawn to different people.
The moment you catch yourself dwelling on negative emotions associated with social rejection, try to divert your attention to the supportive friends you currently have. Remind yourself that there are people who love you and accept you for who you are. You are not rejected and you are most certainly loved by many.
People are not judging your every move.
Social anxiety will convince you that people are paying attention to your every move and throwing judgmental glances your way, but that’s just not true. Most often than not, people are too busy navigating their busy schedules or dealing with their own lives that they just won’t have the time to watch everything you’re doing.
One of the symptoms of social phobia is an extreme fear of judgment. This fear can cause you to be hyper-vigilant about other people’s behaviors and possibly misread their actions. So, whenever you start to feel like everyone’s watching you, try to pause and relax. Once you’ve calmed down, re-evaluate your environment again, challenge your negative thoughts, and objectively try to identify what’s really happening.
Facing your fears can help your recovery.
You probably don’t want to read this, but there’s no escaping this important truth: facing your fear helps.
While avoiding your fears can give you the temporary relief of being free from scary social situations, it doesn’t do much to help you get closer to progress. If anything, isolation strips you of the opportunity to truly cope with your social anxiety. Letting your fear have the upper hand will only amplify its power and make it seem like it’s more frightening than it actually is.
Take small steps to overcome this. You can start by engaging in one-on-one social conversations with a friend first and then slowly work your way to more challenging social interactions. The key is continually stepping out and being patient with yourself. Not every attempt will be successful, and that’s okay. As you continue to face your fears, you’ll find that your confidence will slowly grow and help you cope better.
It’s healthy to release your emotions every day.
For some people, the struggle with anxiety results in a constant weight of negative emotions that get pent up for long periods. This is both frustrating and detrimental to your mental health because it allows negative thoughts to continually saturate your mind with lies. To counter this, you need a healthy avenue to regularly release your emotions and process your thoughts objectively.
Journaling is a great way to do this because it provides you with a safe and controlled environment where you can be vulnerable without fear of judgment from other people. But the biggest benefit that you can get from writing down your thoughts is the fact that it can help disrupt the flow of negative thoughts. Writing will force you to sift through them one by one and identify negative thought patterns. Once you know the lies being planted by anxiety, you can actively challenge them and even negate them by positives.
However, consistency is key in building a strong journaling habit. This is where digital journals like Reflectly can be especially helpful because they can give you daily reminders to log your thoughts for the day and even track your progress so you know how well you’re doing.
To the person reading this:
We know that the fight with SAD may seem like a giant to overcome, but even giants can be defeated, too. It won’t happen overnight but with consistent treatment, you’ll get there eventually. Until then, be kind to yourself and don’t the lies get the best of you.
