Men often find it difficult to admit to themselves and others that they struggle with depression. This is due to cultural perceptions, self-imposed expectations, and misconceived symptoms. This article will discuss the signs to look out for and the solutions to consider for men dealing with depression.
Depression is a serious and pervasive medical condition that affects both men and women. However, it continues to be surrounded by stigma, mainly when discussed concerning the former. This can be attributed to perpetuations of toxic masculinity that still persist to this day. These ideas are already problematic in themselves, but they become lethal when attached to mental health concerns such as depression. This article will then break these preconceived notions and look into solutions that could help men dealing with depression.
Why does depression in men usually go undiagnosed?
Research by the Centers of Disease Control and Prevention shows that depression is more common among women. But, it has been asserted that the representation of men in this study was insufficient. This may be attributed to the fact that due to various biological and social factors, depression manifests itself differently in men. The primary symptom is still sadness, but there are accompanying tendencies such as aggression, agitation, and violence. It then moves into unhealthy coping territories, such as addictions, substance abuse, and even gambling. With such external expressions in place, many men have difficulty identifying depression within themselves, leading to failure in seeking treatment.
Even when a man goes to a doctor to get help, there could be a misdiagnosis. This is because men tend to focus on physical symptoms rather than emotional ones. Thus, they will promptly report their inability to sleep or lack of libido, not their feeling agitated or hopeless.
There is also the fact that men are traditionally pressured to portray themselves as strong and stoic. It prompts them to hide and suppress their emotions. While this may seem admirable in their eyes, as they deem themselves responsible enough to keep themselves together, it reflects the inability to grasp how serious depression could be.
Perhaps, it is for this reason that men are four times more likely to die by suicide than women. When they feel like they cannot confide in anyone but can no longer handle the weight of their emotions, they may think that the only way to make the pain go away is by taking their own lives.
And so, if you are a man and you relate to this, please know that depression is not a sign of emotional weakness. If anything, it takes a special kind of strength to face depression head-on.
Furthermore, it does not make you a failure as a man. It just makes you a human being, and that’s completely okay. Being depressed does not make you less of a person, and it does not diminish your value as a man.
Signs of depression in men
If you feel like you or someone you know might be struggling with depression, here are the signs to look out for:
- Inability to concentrate
- Obsessive-compulsive thought patterns
- Sleep issues
- Sexual dysfunction
- Feeling irritable, agitated, angry, and hopeless
- Loss of interest in work and hobbies
- Substance abuse
- Drinking problems
- Reckless behavior
- Fatigue
- Avoiding social situations
- Withdrawal and isolation from friends and family
- Working obsessively without breaks
- Back and chest pain
- Eating too much or too little
- Suicidal thoughts
Causes of depression in men
We cannot cite just one reason for depression in men. In fact, there does not always have to be a reason. But because men are wired to perceive things logically, many may want to receive reasonable explanations for what they are going through. With this, we’re going to look at five possible causes of depression in men:
- Genetic factors. Research indicates that men who have in their family a history of depression are more likely to struggle with depression themselves.
- Illness. Health issues such as diabetes, heart disease, cancer, or Parkinson’s disease can lead to the onset of depression. Medications that are taken for these illnesses may also trigger depression as a side effect.
- Stress. Significant life changes, losing a loved one, financial problems, and work issues could lead to depression. This is especially true if the person in question has unhealthy coping mechanisms.
- Loneliness, lack of social support, and isolation. While these do not necessarily impose depression upon a man, they are significant triggers that could lead to it.
- Unresolved trauma and childhood abuse. If a man was abused in any way growing up, he was likely unable to receive appropriate mental and emotional help. These unresolved issues then continue to simmer within him, and their effects emerge in the way he perceives life, himself, and his relationships.
Treatment options and coping strategies
There are multiple ways to address depression in men. Milder cases may choose to employ self-help practices, while more severe cases are implored to seek help from mental healthcare professionals. In this list, we will look at the possible options, starting with lifestyle changes, leading to therapy and medication.
Learn healthy coping strategies
Replacing destructive coping mechanisms with better habits is a necessary, foundational step for dealing with depression. For instance, instead of releasing pent-up energy on gambling, alcohol, and substance abuse, you could consider getting into boxing, sports, and weight training. Exercise is known to produce endorphins that could help with depression, and the physical release that you can achieve in the process is beneficial for your mental health.
If you want to become more aware of how well you’re doing in this regard, it would be good to keep track of how many days you have successfully replaced the old habit with the better habit. To do this, you can manually keep track of your streak on your calendar or your planner. But if that is too tedious, you could choose to download habit tracking apps such as Done so that you can just tick off the days and log in the data without exerting too much effort.
Have structures and goals
Men should be encouraged to have daily schedules and set goals because these speak to their innate responsibility and need for success. A good structure will help you stay aligned to your dreams and motivations and make getting through each day more manageable.
You can start by creating simple to-do lists so that you don’t immediately get overwhelmed with the tasks you need to accomplish. You can opt to buy checklists from your local bookstore, or you can use the Notes app on your phone. However, if you want to experiment with formats and add personalization, you can download third-party apps such as Do to streamline your goals and create an interface that would work for you.
Seek social support
Reaching out to others may be difficult at first, but there is no shame in connecting with people. It goes beyond jokes with a co-worker and sports conversations with the bartender. Instead, this hinges on trust, as men need someone that they could open up to and have valuable life conversations with. If women need their bride tribe, men also need their bros.
However, if you are apprehensive about the thought of opening up to people you know, you could also choose to look for a men’s support group that deals with depression within your area. There are options for anonymity, while others are deliberate in building authentic connections. You could simply start with what you are comfortable with and then see how you would want to move forward from there.
Talk to a therapist
Working with a therapist would be advantageous, no matter how mild or severe your depression is. While self-study is useful, only a professional would be able to suggest what kind of therapy would work best for you. While there is surely the employment of talk therapy, they could also craft a tailor-fit collaborative care approach just for you.
Though therapy may seem optional for milder cases, it is indispensable if you have already dealt with suicidal thoughts. It may be quite the investment, but it will prove to be worth it in the end.
Take medication
Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors and serotonin-norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors are specifically effective for depression in men. However, do note that this is something that must come with a prescription from your therapist. Antidepressants usually take several weeks to take effect, and they come with physical side effects; as such, you must help your doctor monitor their effectiveness.
Coming to terms with depression is no easy feat, and the weight of the process is heavier on men. Identifying the symptoms can be confusing, and seeking help is even more challenging. However, it is worth pressing through. Not only will addressing it lead to a better life, it could also potentially save your life.
